Apocalyptic Ape #3100 Kids "Not Hot" Sauce
SKU: 59872769232

Apocalyptic Ape #3100 Kids "Not Hot" Sauce

Sale price$16.20 Regular price$18.00
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Description

Apocalyptic Ape #3100 Kids "Not Hot" SauceNot Hot Sauce Training Wheels for Future Spice Lords Not Hot Sauce is what you get when you want all the chaos of Apocalyptic Rations flavor with none of the fire department involvement. This bottle is built for tiny rebels, spice cowards, and flavor fans who want zero burn and maximum drip. Cane sugar, peaches, and red chili puree come together to make a sweet, tangy glaze that tastes like a fruit stand that survived the apocalypse. Tomatoes, jalapeo

“Not Hot” Sauce – Training Wheels for Future Spice Lords

“Not Hot” Sauce is what you get when you want all the chaos of Apocalyptic Rations flavor with none of the fire department involvement.

This bottle is built for tiny rebels, spice cowards, and flavor fans who want zero burn and maximum drip. Cane sugar, peaches, and red chili puree come together to make a sweet, tangy glaze that tastes like a fruit stand that survived the apocalypse. Tomatoes, jalapeño peppers, cayenne, and capsicum oil are present in micro-doomsday doses, just enough to bring authentic chili flavor without lighting a single tongue on fire.

Vidalia onions (1.34% by weight, because we’re nerds) plus minced onion and salt lend that mellow, caramel-y, savory note, while vinegar keeps it bright and dippable. Smooth, clingy texture that coats nuggets, fries, and anything your future hot sauce fiend is willing to test.

This is the gateway bottle. Today, “Not Hot.” Tomorrow… Scorpion Dust.

Flavor Profile:

  • Sweet: Cane sugar, peaches, and tomato for candy-adjacent glaze vibes

  • Tangy: Vinegar and chili puree keep it bright, not boring

  • Savory: Vidalia onions, minced onion, and salt for gentle umami depth

  • Chili Flavor, Zero Fear: Red chili, jalapeño, cayenne, and capsicum oil in baby-step amounts

Heat Level: NONE
All flavor, no fire. Approved for kids, grandparents, and people who think black pepper is “a lot.”

Best Deployed On: Chicken nuggets, fries, tater tots, mac and cheese, grilled cheese, pizza crusts, rice bowls, and any bland post-collapse snack in desperate need of sweet, tangy, zero-risk chaos.

Ingredients: Water, Cane Sugar, Red Chili Puree, Vinegar, Peaches, Jalapeno Peppers, Salt, Minced Onion, Tomatoes, Vidalia Onions, Cayenne Pepper, Xanthan Gum, And Capsicum Oil.

Refrigerate After Opening. 1.34% Vidalia Onion by Weight. May Contain Pits.

Shipping Notes
  • Free Standard Shipping on $100+ Orders to the USA.
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Exchange/Return Notes
  • We offer a 30-day return/exchange service after receiving.
  • Final sale items are not eligible for returns or exchanges.
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SKU: 59872769232

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Dustin O
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Reviewed in the United States on April 20, 2026
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Exactly what I was looking for
Color: Brown, Size: 3Tier48in, Color: Brown, Size: 3Tier48in
Very sturdy shelves and super easy to put together. I would put the shelves together starting with the bottoms then after it’s put together tighten everything up also starting from the bottom.
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Reviewed in the United States on March 16, 2026
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★★★★★ 5
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Love how this looks like genuine pipes but a little lighter in weight. Sturdy and easier than DIY project!
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Angelique Desforges
Draper, US
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Beautiful Shelves.
Color: Brown, Size: 3Tier48in, Color: Brown, Size: 3Tier48in
Did not come with instructions but easy to assemble once you start putting together. Very sturdy and well made, real wood shelves, not too heavy but can definitely hold a decent amount of weight. The shelves themselves are rough (could have been sanded better) but where it’s for decor and not every day use, no one would ever know. I love it.
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